my art, my world: paintings from 2007-2008

New beginings
It all starts where all stories begin. This place of beginnings can only be seen in dreams. The place where the intellect is too limiting to describe what it cannot partake of, neither is the intellect mature enough to express in words the goings-on of this very place.

In this beginning, she is given a garment to wear, “It will keep you warm. When you are judged by appearance, this shall make you familiar,” they say. “And in this,” they hand her a carrier bag made of intangible material, “you shall put all that you find of which you believe is of value to you.” With loving hands they push her on wishing her well. But one of them ran to her even after all was said and done, whispered in her ear, “choose those things that will remain with you for as long as you are, they will help you find your way home.”

Her first step takes her to a peculiar world where all things are new to her. There are many like her, myriads of her type. Like her, all are searching. Many do not know what they are searching for, some know and some think that they know. There are those that search in pairs and in small groups and there are those that search alone. Some collect earthy materials inevitably perishable and some collect memories.

Everything collected is stored in the bag and every bag acquires its weight. Some hoard and some share. Some carry their bags on their back and they appear hunched over and those that drag their bags behind them stretch their arms out of proportion. Very many carry their bags on their heads and they always appear to have stiff necks. But if you are fortunate to find a few who carry their bags with their heart, intuitively, you will know them.
She had walked through many paths, she had acquired many good things and a few of them were bad but she carried all on her head and persisted in her journey despite her weary legs. One very good day she stopped for a drink of water offered to her by a butcher in the market. He beckoned her to stay and rest a while. He took the weight off of her and with him she found relief. She opened her bag and all that she had she shared with him. Together they collected new things and began a new journey. In this very journey of theirs a new life is born.

Eight days after she was born, she was given the name Ajantola. Peculiar Ajantola. She is one of very few who search for nothing and if they indeed have bags they never utilize them. The universe was her bag but for some inexplicable reason she could not grasp it. She was a member of a small audience that watched on while majority of the people busied themselves performing on stage. She pursued nothing but expected top-notch choices. She gave nothing but deserved to own the finest. Ajantola, perpetually grumbling. But there is the remedy for her type; the world of material acquisition teaches you cannot own what you have not earned. But Ajantola became angry. This world cheated her of her mother who died too soon. She was not the most beautiful of her peers neither was she the wittiest. Ajantola the very average girl believes the world cheated her from having the best of everything. She married an average man who offered her an average home. The worst of all the frauds she accused the world of was the world gave her a firstborn female child!

The midwife had placed the baby on her breasts. It was bitter for her to labor for so long to have a child with the wrong genitalia. Ajantola would always check to see if she was mistaken. She had hoped or maybe she imagined that by some wonderment her baby would grow new genitalia but after a month she reconciled with her disappointment. The world remained unfair and Ajantola kept her grudge.

Then she heard a message! She learned there was a force bigger than the world and if she immersed herself in religious rites to this force, she just might get all that she thought she deserved. No, Ajantola is not a fanatic but she is very religious and if she prays hard and often enough she will find herself in lofty places. This is a new Ajantola, the mother of a girl child Silifat.